A while ago, while playing with AI, I made a video about twelve things we need to understand about life. Coming back to that list made me want to write it out more slowly. In a short video, a sentence can sound final. In life, it usually needs context, a few exceptions, and plenty of patience.
These days I'd rather think of them as things I'm learning. Some I know by heart and still struggle to practice. Others mean something different each time I return to them. Maybe you feel that too.
1. Not everything you hope for from others will arrive
In the video I put it more bluntly: “Nobody owes you anything.” Today I'd add some nuance. There are commitments, rights, and responsibilities we can rightly expect people to honor. But the recognition, affection, or opportunity we hope for doesn't always arrive the way we imagined.
You can appreciate what comes while also letting your life move forward before someone chooses you. Send the proposal, look for another door, say what you need. Letting go of an expectation can make room for something new.
2. Not everyone will like you
Publishing an idea, sharing a project, or simply saying no means accepting that someone will disagree. That's hard, especially when you care about what you're doing.
Listening to criticism can help. Trying to turn every criticism into approval can leave you without a voice of your own. I like coming back to a simple question: am I being honest and respectful in what I want to say? Sometimes that's enough to keep going.
3. Your time deserves a choice
Knowing that time doesn't come back can create urgency, but I wouldn't want to use that thought to rush through every day. Resting, talking without an agenda, or having a quiet afternoon can be meaningful too.
The trouble starts when our days fill themselves with things we never chose. Every so often, it's worth looking at the week and asking how much room there was for what matters to us. If there was none, perhaps we can make a small space next week.
4. Discipline helps when enthusiasm fades
Some days starting is easy. On others, the enthusiasm never arrives. A small routine can support you then: open the document, read two pages, spend a few minutes practicing.
It needs flexibility too. If you're exhausted, reducing the commitment or resting may be the sensible choice. Consistency grows more easily from something you can sustain than from a demand that leaves you unwilling to return.
5. A failure can give you information
When something goes wrong, it rarely feels like a wonderful lesson. First it hurts, frustrates, or embarrasses us. Later, with some room to breathe, we may understand what failed and what we'd do differently.
Not every failure means we didn't want it enough, and persistence isn't always the best response. Sometimes we need to change the method, ask for help, or leave a path behind. A poor result doesn't have to become a definition of who you are.
6. Choose what success means to you
From the outside, a life can look spectacular and still be difficult to live from within. More attention, money, or projects won't necessarily fit what someone needs at that point in their life.
Before chasing someone else's picture, ask what you want your ordinary days to allow. Perhaps it's work that interests you, time with people you love, or sleep without taking the whole office to bed. Those things deserve ambition too.
7. Comparison can show you a path, but not your worth
Seeing what someone else has achieved can be inspiring. The trouble is comparing their most visible result with everything you know about your own doubts and difficulties.
We don't know their whole journey. To understand our own, it often helps to look closer: what we understand now that we didn't before, what we've dared to try, what we've learned to care for. Some progress doesn't fit into a photograph.
8. Being alone is something we can learn
A little time without conversation, notifications, or entertainment can feel strange. It can also give you a chance to hear an idea that kept getting buried in the noise.
That doesn't make every kind of solitude good. When it feels heavy or unwanted, seeking company matters. I want to learn to be with myself while still needing other people. A walk without headphones can be enough of a start.
9. You need care too
It's easy to look after a project more carefully than the person doing it. We put off a meal, rest, or a conversation we need to have. Then we're surprised when there's no room left for anything.
Care doesn't have to become another perfect project. It can begin with a pause, some movement you enjoy, or asking for support when you need it. Your well-being deserves attention even when you have nothing to prove today.
10. You can begin before you feel completely ready
Some things require serious preparation. For others, waiting for absolute certainty is an elegant way to keep putting them off.
If the step is small and you can correct it, try. A draft, a conversation, a first version. Many of my experiments with AI began that way, with curiosity and no clear idea of how they'd turn out. Learning during the attempt counts as preparation too.
11. What you give can create connections
Sharing an idea, listening carefully, or helping someone can leave something valuable, even without an immediate response. Sometimes a conversation or opportunity appears that you couldn't have planned.
There's no guarantee that everything comes back, and you don't need to give until you're depleted. I like generosity with boundaries: offer what you can without turning every gesture into a debt someone else must repay.
12. Nobody has everything figured out
Some people have a great deal of experience, and we can learn from them. They still have doubts, change their minds, and encounter situations they've never faced before.
Remembering that eases my own demand to have an answer for everything. We can make decisions with what we know today and revisit them tomorrow. We can ask questions. We can say “I don't know yet” and keep looking.
If one of these ideas helps you, keep that one. You don't need to apply all twelve tomorrow or turn life into another to-do list. Perhaps it's enough to reclaim a little time for something of your own, try a first step, or speak to yourself with more patience.
The list came from this short video I made while experimenting with AI. I like revisiting those early attempts: they remind me that we start with what we have and gradually find our own way. Sending you a hug.