I like the question in this title because it gives some initiative back to us: can we do anything to make more good things happen?
We cannot control everything. Life brings circumstances we did not choose and days when things simply go wrong. But between waiting for our luck to change and pretending we can command every outcome lies an enormous space. That is where our everyday decisions live.
We can take care of where we place our attention, how we speak to ourselves, who receives our time, and what we do with the energy available. None of those decisions forces the world to respond as we want. Together, however, they make us more capable of recognizing an opportunity, creating a good moment, or taking the step we have been postponing.
That is the idea I take from How to Make Good Things Happen: a better life is not only something we wait for; it is also something we prepare for.
And we do not need to change everything to begin. Seven small practices are enough to start today.
1. Recover your attention
Attention is one of our most valuable resources and, at the same time, one of those we surrender most easily.
We can spend an entire morning responding to notifications, replaying old conversations, or imagining problems that have not occurred. By the end, we are exhausted without quite knowing what we did.
The first exercise is simple. In fact, you can try it while reading: pause for a moment, take three breaths, and ask yourself:
Where is my attention right now?
Perhaps you are revisiting the past. Perhaps you are anticipating the future. Remembering and planning are necessary too. The useful question is whether you chose to be there or your mind wandered without you noticing.
Returning to the present may be as simple as feeling your breathing, looking at what is in front of you, and choosing the next concrete step.
Mindfulness practices work on precisely this ability to return to the present. You do not need to turn the exercise into a perfect session or download an app. The point is to come back, several times each day, to what you are actually doing. If you want to go deeper, the US National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health offers a cautious review of the available evidence.
2. Lower the pressure before demanding motivation
Sometimes we interpret exhaustion as a character flaw.
We decide we are lazy, unmotivated, or insufficiently committed when we may simply have spent several days sleeping poorly, switching constantly between tasks, and checking our phones from the moment we open our eyes.
Before demanding more from yourself, make a kind assessment of the basics:
- Did you get enough sleep?
- Can you begin the day without immediately checking notifications?
- Are you trying to do one thing or five at once?
- How long has it been since you rested without feeling guilty?
Sleep is not a prize we receive after finishing everything. It is part of the infrastructure we use to think, feel, and work. The CDC summarizes its importance for health and well-being.
Some days progress requires insisting a little longer. Other days require recovering energy. Learning to tell the difference is also a form of discipline—and perhaps a much-needed way of treating ourselves better.
3. End the day by finding three good things
At the end of the day, write down three good things that happened.
They do not need to be extraordinary. It might be a conversation, something you learned, a meal you enjoyed, a task you finally completed, or five minutes of calm.
The point is not to deny what went wrong or force yourself to feel something you do not. Its value is simpler: training your eyes so that one difficult thing does not automatically hide everything else.
Our memory of a day can be taken over by one unpleasant email even when ten kind moments surrounded it. Writing them down does not erase the email. It prevents it from becoming the only narrator.
After one week, read the list again. You may find something more valuable than seven days of memories: a small map of the people, places, and activities that make you feel better. Perhaps it contains a clue about what deserves more room in your life.
4. Change the way you speak to yourself
Your own voice is the one you hear most often. Sometimes we allow it to say things we would never say to someone we love.
“This is a disaster.”
“Nothing ever works for me.”
“I am no good at this.”
You do not need to answer those statements with grand phrases you do not believe. Try a fairer, more accurate version:
“This is uncomfortable, and I need to solve it.”
“I have not found the way yet.”
“I made a mistake here; now I need to understand why.”
This is not lying to yourself. It is separating a fact from a verdict.
Naming the situation accurately reduces the size of the monster. A project may have failed without your entire life becoming a disaster. Something may not work for you yet without defining who you are.
Speaking to yourself respectfully does not remove responsibility. It lets you assume it while caring for the person who will need to stand up and try again: you.
5. Notice how people leave you feeling
Some people leave us feeling lighter, more curious, or ready to move forward after a conversation. Other relationships repeatedly leave us tired, afraid, or feeling that we always need to defend ourselves.
The book uses the idea of “vitamin people”: relationships that listen, inspire, and help restore energy.
You can make a private list around two questions:
- Who usually leaves me feeling better after we talk?
- Which relationships repeatedly leave me drained?
There is no need to label anyone “toxic” too quickly. We all go through difficult periods, and every worthwhile relationship requires effort. Look honestly at the pattern: whether there is respect, reciprocity, and room to be yourself; whether the relationship helps you grow or asks you to become smaller.
Social connection matters for health and well-being, as described in the US Surgeon General's advisory on social connection. Moving closer to people who leave you feeling better and setting limits where needed is not selfish. It means caring for the environment that is shaping you too.
6. Look for meaning, not just motivation
We cannot feel enthusiastic all the time. If we wait until we feel like acting, many important things will remain postponed.
Meaning provides another kind of fuel.
Ask yourself:
What gives my life meaning today?
The answer might be caring for someone, learning, building a project, doing your work well, creating, teaching, or maintaining a friendship. It does not have to be a grand or permanent mission.
Meaning changes too. What organized your life five years ago may no longer do so. That is why the question is worth revisiting.
When an action connects with something we value, it does not always become easy. It becomes easier to remember why it deserves the effort.
7. Begin the day with a better question
Before looking at what everyone else expects from you, ask:
What can I do today to increase the chances that something good will happen?
The answer might be sending the message you have been thinking about, completing a delayed task, taking a walk, asking for help, publishing an idea, calling someone, or resting in time.
I like the question because it does not ask, “What good thing should happen to me?” It returns part of the initiative to you.
Many opportunities look like luck from the outside. Before they appeared, however, somebody often learned a skill, showed their work, started a conversation, or turned up once more. They did not control the outcome. They were in motion when it appeared.
Try it for one week
Do not turn this into another test you need to pass. Choose one week and try this routine with curiosity:
- In the morning, choose one action that might open the door to something good.
- During the day, recover your attention when you notice it drifting.
- Do one thing at a time whenever possible.
- Correct one cruel sentence in your internal dialogue.
- Seek at least one genuine connection with another person.
- At night, write down three good things.
Then observe what changed. Do not ask only whether more pleasant things occurred. Notice whether you were more present, protected your energy better, spoke to someone you missed, or did something you would otherwise have postponed.
The week may not change your life. It might change a morning, a conversation, or a decision. Good chapters often begin that way: with one small movement that opens the next.
This is not magic or a way to blame yourself for everything beyond your control. If you are experiencing anxiety, depression, burnout, or another health issue, these exercises do not replace professional support either. They are an approachable way to participate, with what you have today, in building something better.
Good things sometimes happen by chance. At other times, they find us because we protected our energy, looked up, and dared to take a step. Today may be a good day to take one.
You can see these exercises in a more direct format and tell me which one you will try first in the original YouTube video.